For I Know the Plans

Since I haven't posted in awhile, let me start with some big fun news...

We are adopting a baby! 

Bam! We are so excited, and we want you to be excited with us. This is a time for celebration indeed!

Oh where, oh where is our baby to be...

There is a big part of me that wants to start the story there; to not invite people into the first part, mostly in fear that this decision to adopt will be looked on as second best. There is this guilt that by talking about the bad, I'm giving the good the short end of the stick. But that's my mind playing tricks on me because doesn't knowing the full story make the happy ending that much sweeter? It's why people watch the whole movie, or read the whole book.  When you know what someone has gone through, triumph is that much more exceptional.

So, here is a little bit of our story and struggle that led us on the path of adoption. Even before we got married, Andy and I talked about adoption. With my health stuff we didn't know if it would be possible for me to carry a baby. As we started preparing our hearts to be parents, I started investigating what it would take: seeking professional opinions from my Cystic Fibrosis doctors and following other CF mom's stories through blogs and groups. My heart became so full as my doctors were on board, and so many of the stories I read were so positive. People whose lung function was actually much worse than mine had normal pregnancies. All these fears I had were being put to rest one by one. With that being said, Andy and I began praying and trying to make a baby.

After about six months with no baby in my belly, I went in for a couple tests to make sure everything was working properly. The doctor called about a week later and said he had some bad news.  My FSH level (follicle-stimulating hormone) was extremely high, which indicated I had a condition called Premature Ovarian Failure. He explained that for someone my age the level should be at about a five while someone who was going through menopause would be at a 12.  My level was a 96!  He told me how sorry he was and that Andy and I should definitely see a fertility specialist. We immediately scheduled an appointment, though we were prepared to hear from him that our chances of having a baby biologically would be very low. As we sat in the doctor's office, he confirmed what we already knew, there was really no way of us conceiving a baby on our own.  Moreover, they didn't know why this had happened to me. He said he'd be happy to talk to us and walk us through fertility treatment options, but he could tell we didn't seem too interested in that idea. It was instantaneous in that moment that God fully opened our hearts to adoption.

                                                                       

So we jumped right in!  Adoption was not our original idea, but that doesn't make it second best by any means. There is this funny little verse: Jeremiah 29:11.  It says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." That is the verse that we remember when our road changes direction. Our God is for us, not against us. It has been so amazing to see God working in this story so far. As we pray about our baby and adoption, Christ continues to keep Andy and I aligned in so many important ways. Since we started this journey, we have been beyond amazed at how natural everything has progressed.  Truly it seems this was the plan all along. So please join us in praying for our family as we start this adventure of adoption! We are soooo excited!

Thank you to our families for your support!  We are also incredibly grateful for our sweet friends, Chris, Shelley, and baby Liv for encouraging us with their story as well as connecting us to our amazing adoption consultant, Susan.  We also must thank Jordan for making us look as purdy as a landscape.  Oh, and are you wondering where that sweet map came from?  It was one of those old school classroom maps (before we went digital)!  Thanks to Lorynda from LifeBridge for letting us borrow it!  Please continue visiting the blog as we promise to be better bloggers and keep this site updated. :)

With so much love, joy, thanksgiving and hopefully a new baby soon :)

Andy + Mimi + Frank + 1

"That which I refuse to thank Christ for, I refuse to believe Christ can redeem." 

- Ann Voskamp

Blinded by the Light

Dear Online Fans,

We haven't spoken in a long time-- like over a year, what happened? I thought this was going to be an ongoing relationship- why did you fail me? I need you more than you need me and I think you knew that and you took advantage of the situation-- I'm not saying I'm going to hold it against you I'm just saying I know. So let's move on....

The small stuff is the big stuff really so let me start by saying, I got new glasses.

Impressed?  I was-- by the clear crisp lines of the world. Seriously, faces have expressions, signs have words, and most importantly, roads have lines. Truly the world is a new place. And because I can't just appreciate something at face value I started thinking about the symbolism behind seeing things (very literally) clearly.

 I'm lucky enough to be able to afford an eye exam and a hot new pair frames and it still took me roughly four years to get myself to make the switch-- and because of my birth lottery ('Merica/1st world country) I knew that blurry vision could easily be corrected and that the world wasn't supposed to move in blob like shapes. So what's the flip side to that? What if where you were born wasn't privileged to Lenscrafters and no one ever checked your eyes and you always thought that things were blurry five feet from your face and that's just how the world looked. Would it change how you thought of things; of beauty? of precision? of correlation? of fear?  I don't even really have that big of an impairment -- and I have access to like three Lenscrafters-- and yet each of these things looked differently through my new lenses. You can imagine how beauty might change if you can't see the creases on your face or how I was more fearful when driving because I could never really see the road ahead.

*Run on sentence warning ahead. ----There is also that whole thought of how do we instigate peace with the world when what we think we are presenting is peace because that is what we see it as but the other side is looking through their own lens and what we show them as peace doesn't look anything like peace and so they counter offer with their vision of peace and to us that looks nothing like peace because we have our own glasses on so we argue and fight instead of trying to put on each others glasses. But that is a whole other story.

But what I have is today, so I celebrate the details in God's creation -- because today I can see them.

With laughter and joy,

Mimi


**Author note-- I've changed the name of my blog and the web address. Although the Salonen's have many adventures --setbacks in life tend to have the better story-- at least that's how my life plays out :) So update your book marks -- haha --wait I mean bookmark this page and follow me.
www.ourtemporarysetbacks.blogspot.com

On The Third Day of Christmas...

Wooahhh.  It's been five days since Christmas.  Tough to wait for our third blog post?  Lots happening here in Montana with family, friends, eating, more eating, church, gifts, more food, appetizers, cookies, dinners, breakfasts and brunch, snowboarding...  Hopefully you all enjoyed our savior's birthday!

My True love gave to me:

A Wonderful Household of Three

You can stop the cute "aww's" ....now. But here is the reality: I LOVE our little family, Andy, myself and...... FRANK!

The most important thing to know about our family unit is that at least 70 percent of all communication between Andy and I, is medium'ed through Frank. Let me give you an example:

Andy and I are sitting on the couch and I'm hungry. Instead of saying, "Hey dear, I'm hungry do you want to get something to eat?" the conversation plays out more like the following: (It is important to note that I have a "Frank" voice that blends the tone of Eeyor and with the conversation skills of Debbie Downer.  All of my text below should be read in said voice):

Mimi: I'm gonna bite ya
Andy: Oh no, Franky, what's wrong?
Mimi: Well daddy, I don't like you.
Andy: Franky Boy, don't say that. How 'bout we get you a little treat?
Mimi: Oh ya that would be good but I'm pretty mad and I still wanna bite ya.
Andy: Why don't you ask the mommy what she would like to have?
Mimi: I'll bite her too. I"m so mad, but she worked so hard today and doesn't want to cook so lets go to Noodles.

Boom! We've figured out my "need" and then the conversation progresses until we have a solution. Anyways, just a little insight to our horribly anti-social, ridiculously unstable antics. I pray for our future children.

Hope all of you had a Merry Christmas!

A & M

On the Second Day of Christmas...

We are on a roll here in the Salonen household, and are thankful you are reading our version of a Christmas newsletter.  God has blessed us in so many ways this year and taught us so many things.  Follow us in the upcoming days and read The Twelve Days of Christmas!

On the Second Day of Christmas, my true love gave two me: Two married siblings!

I think people heard we got married, saw how wonderful it could be and decided to tie the knot too.  Okay, maybe Liz and Tom had different reasons.

Andy, Mimi, Tom, Diane, Liz, Ryan at Fort Hamilton

Mimi's sister, Liz was the first and married Ryan in July.  They couldn't have chosen a better venue: Vegas!  Between the stretch Hummer limo, drive through ceremony, delicious steak dinner at Gallagher's Steakhouse and Fremont Street experience, the weekend celebration was a lot of fun.  Ryan and Liz are an amazing couple and we are very excited for both of them.

 Tom and Diane were married over Labor Day weekend in September, Big Apple Style.  That's right, Diane grew up in Queens, and the couple decided Fort Hamilton in Brooklyn would be a perfect wedding location. Fort Hamilton is the only active military base in metropolitan New York City, and I recommend visiting if you're ever in the area.  The original fort was a perfect place for dinner, dancing, cigars and lots of fun.  Mimi and I both visited New York previously, but this trip was really special, and we enjoyed time with family, friends celebrating this great occasion.

Congratulations Ryan & Liz and Tom & Diane!  Married life is sweet.

Tom & Diane Allen - September 1, 2012

Ryan & Liz Gage - July 25, 2012

12 Days of Christmas! ...

Well we said we'd do it-- in fact you may even get a Christmas card telling you so-- but here is a a look at the 12 days of Christmas Salonen style. A wrap up, if you will, on the year from our perspective! Did you know the 12 days of Christmas actually begins on Christmas day? ABC Family has been lying to us all for years!  Our 12 Days will start right now.

So with out further ado....

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me.... 1 NEW HOUSE! 

HOME OWNERS! 

In march we purchased our first home! An "A" frame as I like to call it. We have had a blast and some nightmares fixing it up. Things I thought we'd fix right away have taken the back burner to things I thought we wouldn't have to do--- you know the story :) But-- we have had a great time turning Snowmass place into our first little home!  We removed somewhere around sixteen trees from the backyard and Andy still had 50+ bags of leaves come fall (notice how I said Andy). We still have much to do but feel extremely blessed to be homeowners!

Someday I plan to get a garden going and some flowers planted. This year I was able to kill everything in sight... except the weeds.

Our cozy little living room scene... ahhh 

MERRY CHRISTMAS 

& check back tomorrow for another post :) 

All My Eggs Was Right There...

Yes, because I'm a feelings blogger I'll go ahead and say some things today. I was watching a recap of the XFactor recently (like today since I'm allowing myself a grieving period- I'm somewhere between bitterness and big dreams) and a contestant who blew his audition was caught saying "All my eggs was right there, all my eggs was right there." It gave me an immense amount of hope, oddly enough, because I've not put "all my eggs" in an earthly basket.

Yesterday, was my last day at a job I had big dreams for,  it was not my last day by choice. I was laid off, last man on the totem pole type thing I assume, I guess.

     It was funny, as I sat in the mini office with frosted doors at the circular table that I'm sure someone put much thought in to (laying people off should be done in the most pleasant of ways, with eye contact at a coffee table that lets people know, we're not presumptuous we're friends discussing matters that are ever so dreadful) I was caught up in the surrealism of it all. As cliche as it is, I couldn't help thinking the whole time "did I wake up this morning or am I dreaming?"
     While listening, or at least trying to listen, I watched the tears well up in the eyes of the girl next to me and vaguely heard her questions as they laid both of us off. I remember her asking if we needed to be escorted out and my brain snapped back down for a moment. Yes, out, I need to leave immediately; it was hot and uncomfortable in that room. Friends would tell you that my immediate reaction to tears is to run as far and as fast away as possible, I don't know how to console them and I probably have an even greater fear of being seen with them. Whatever it is, it's a flaw.
     I stood up as soon as  they stopped talking looked across the small round desk and said, "I wish I could say it was nice meeting you or thanks but I'm afraid I can't," packed my bag as quickly as possible and got in my car.

There was the worst feeling of shame about the whole thing.  It was the feeling of being replaceable in my own story. I hadn't made myself or my work invaluable, my daily life and tasks had not only been completely meaningless to someone, I myself had been counter productive to the entire company's vision.  Alright, that's probably reading into the whole thing a bit too much, but I have big feelings for such a small girl. The reality of the matter was probably closer to budget cuts and last in first out, but emotion escapes reality. I was ashamed, I was emotional, I felt vulnerable.  But alas, as you all can guess, I am not defeated. :)

Since I was a baby, or at least that's where I like to start this story, I've known I was created to do big things.  And so, it starts...again. I truly have appreciated all of the support so far, so thank you everyone. I'm great, the company is still great, and the world hasn't stopped, mine has merely shifted paradigms.

Heat, House, Mood

Life is swell. The summer's hot, my husbands hot and I've got a job! Yay!
 Things that aren't as swell-- 

1. No AC
2. House Projects
3. Bad Tudes.  

I'll begin with number one. This doesn't really need an explanation does it?  100 degree heat that bakes in your house is pretty ridiculous. Recently, the Husband and I were Face-Timing with my brother Tom, and he was showing us his new house with dual climate control ... to which I said "No Brother Bear, this is dual climate control," and gave him the panoramic view from one window to the next so he could see our fan set up. Legit.

Two fans-- and the long hallways that sits between... it's like AC only... worse.

So this brings us up to numba two!  House Projects--- holy moly do they ever end? I think not. Andy and I have been super blessed with the amount of help from friends and family. It's a little ridiculous actually, so a HUGE thank you to all of you-- you know who you are I've probably baked you cookies or tried to feed you dinner as my way of saying "You are amazing, I love you and I don't know what I would do without your help and you in my life :)" ...in so many words or less. We've had a lot of fun so far though, knocking down walls (Steve), painting (Bill/Sue), furnishing (mike/kris/ann), and working on that lawn(Andy).....oh that lawn.  Hmmm... seems like I personally haven't done much on that list though :/  Shoot! I'll get right on that after this diet coke and episode of American Pickers....
But seriously, working on your house is a lot of work on your marriage. From different project priorities to everyday household cleaning; sometimes the one you love the most is just on a totally different page.  Many times Andy and I have wrestled with figuring out how to be respectful grown-ups with each other..  and sometimes the best option is to just actually wrestle ;)

Number three on the list directly ties into number one and two. Have you ever been sticky sweaty and your husband wants you to get up off the couch (from watching American Pickers)  and pull weeds? It makes for a bad tude. As my BFF, Laura Guay, would always say "We've got two options here; you can change your tude or you can go home!" Unfortunately, I am home when the tude hits. Our household at times is just an awful collaboration of feelings, snarky remarks, a couple screams and low self-confidence. You know those moments when you just lose you mind at a simple harmless remark that someone makes ... and then you lash out irrationally.... and then five minutes later you are apologizing and saying I don't even know where that came from?  Please tell me I'm not the only one who suffers from this-- but if I am-- lucky Andy.

At the end of the day though, for all my irrational moodiness, I know I've got my guy that loves me. He's tenderhearted and patient and because of this I will work on my tude. Until we see each other in Heaven (where we will all be perfect) he'll have to take my unkind words with a grain of salt and an eye roll... but from the other room because if I saw him roll his eyes at me..... oh boy.

With love and mercy,

Mimi